Taken chances: life without the raincoat
A modern-day Principessa. A beautiful, mysterious woman. She fascinates you with her classy appearance and royal posture, but it is her words and emotional sharpness that win your heart forever. Restless, pragmatic, libertine, addictive. In love with love and life itself. A patron of arts. A promoter of beauty and a vivid consumer of dreams. Cultured. Refined. A noble heart, but an untamed spirit.
Every time you meet her, you get the same feeling: that there is more than meets the eye. You only get to hear half of her thoughts and discover only half of her universe. The rest belongs to her. Entirely and privately.
I invited her to write a piece on “Taken chances”, as she is one of those 1 in a million people, who’s artfully mastering her destiny with conviction and determination.
Meet La Principessa!
Good morning. It is 01.34, December 21st, 2012 as I start writing these words. I find it hard to put down a few thoughts on my computer since easy and comfortable to me is to use a pen and a piece of paper instead. Checking the clock I noticed I survived the end of the world. Must be lucky indeed 🙂
Checking also the big white fur ball, sleeping deeply and peacefully next to me. I can see the long fur on the belly getting curly as the hair of sweated babies does while they are sleeping their angelic dreams. He is peaceful and happy. The mentioned one is my male kitten who got into my life two and a half years ago: I found him at the edge of a forest and it was like a materialized sign of protection from above. I daily look at him and feel he is my angel. A gorgeous one, noble in posture and personality.
I draw back the curtains and look on the balcony at the dove rescued from the snow a few days ago, I found it almost frozen to death, so I decided to keep the privilege of its company till the weather will get a bit warmer. Birdie is resting as well.
Definitely the world won’t get apart. At least not today.
I am a freelancer. I work as real estate broker but I do not consider myself one. I am a communication practitioner. I am not financially rich, I am not bright, I am a simple woman who let herself feel. And the most important part is that I am free. And I am also happy. I am not chasing happiness, I am simply choosing to live it.
Is there someone willing to read something coming from a happy one? With no complaining, frustration, no disappointments? No political views, no grumpiness caused by the cold weather or snow?
If so, let’s take a few minutes ride into what dears Venom and Clover found interesting to so kindly ask me to join their alley and take some steps along it.
Taken chances are not about looking for something and waiting for. It’s about knowing myself, hearing myself but truly, deeply. It’s about Listening the inner voice and Seeing near and around with the eyes of the soul. It’s not about knowing what makes me happy, I don’t really know what it is until I live and step through. It’s also about being fair, being honest to myself first.
As most of us, I wanted certain things and people to have around, to work with, to make love to or to live with. Some of my desires have been happily accomplished but were not followed by expected waves of happiness. Well, not always.
Today I am 35 y.o. In 2007 I said the moment I learned to say NO changed my life.
Today, I know the day I learned to say YES did. To not judge, to not think twice, my heart, my instinct will give me on the very first second, the best answer. I take it. I won’t let the brain take control. Happiness in its deepest meaning is a matter of the heart, not the brain. Brain relates to comfort, security, heart relates to true happiness. And the biggest happiness comes from love.
(I felt I started everything all over again many times. But actually I only went further with more wisdom. I learned, I remembered.)
Take the plane, pick up the phone, leave the mirror, leave the wallet, take the lipstick. Follow the instinct. Breath in. Blush, lose your temper, laugh childishly, don’t be formal. Live, cry. Love. Be natural. Feel. Say “I love you” when you do. Say “I miss you” when you do. Forget ego, don’t wait the other one to say it first to keep yourself secure.
The biggest happiness is to love and second after is to confess it, after all, as Octavian Paler wrote once.
Indeed, when you stop trying and start living, you get all you wished for. You will catch yourself in a mirror one day seeing the face you wanted to wear, the hair you loved, the heartbeat you always hoped to put your chest on fire. Leave your house without the raincoat. Reveal yourself. Risk. Don’t be afraid of failure.
See, there isn’t a certain something about my source of happiness and permanent harmony. I am just taking the easiest way: following my instinct, which I consider cannot be wrong (stop a minute and think how an animal makes us feel, changes us, communicate through hundreds of faces, thousands of things and asking for love before the food … I keep learning that from my kitten and even from the rescued bird that calms itself in my hands, feeling that I won’t do anything to harm her); following your instinct cannot bring regrets.
I am against strategies. In friendship. In love. In my daily living. I am not reporting my actions to others, I am not looking for appreciation. Not even for approval. I am not chasing the “likes”. And what a surprise to get them all so easy just by acting natural. Follow your instinct and do no harm.
I constantly feed myself. With healthy food as music, paintings, walks, books, theaters which cost almost nothing and travel as much as possible. The best spent money is, firstly, in presents for dear ones or even better for strangers and second best is money spent on travels.
I traveled with the same pleasure to Sofia or Maldives, to my childhood village Dor Marunt same as to Sighisoara or Paris. I am dreaming to see India. And Nepal. And Peru. And Japan. And Maramures yet not seen. And Hobita. And Sambata de Sus 🙂
And every day I feed myself with love. Not every day or every time fulfilled. But felt, revealed.
Only this way, you will avoid waking up one day asking yourself “What IF …” We only live once. Or at least once we do for sure. 🙂
I give you all a part of my Eco Christmas tree and wishing the very best end of the year and a 2013 full of love and good feelings. Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
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